Stop Using the Word "Retarded" as an Insult
Heather McCain
If you have a child with special needs, you've probably felt it - that sinking feeling, the knot in the pit of your stomach when someone uses the word "retarded" in place of stupid.
It might be a stranger, or even a family member or friend, but it never fails that when I hear the use of that word in a derogatory way, I wonder what those people must think of my son. Do they think he is incompetent? Or do they really think that them doing something as simple as pushing on a door that says pull equates to the lifelong struggles my child faces?
I know someone is reading this right now and thinking, "man lady, stop being so sensitive." This is not a matter of sensitivity, though. This is me demanding that my son and others like him be treated with respect and dignity.
It might be a stranger, or even a family member or friend, but it never fails that when I hear the use of that word in a derogatory way, I wonder what those people must think of my son. Do they think he is incompetent? Or do they really think that them doing something as simple as pushing on a door that says pull equates to the lifelong struggles my child faces?
I know someone is reading this right now and thinking, "man lady, stop being so sensitive." This is not a matter of sensitivity, though. This is me demanding that my son and others like him be treated with respect and dignity.
Matias, soaking in the sunshine
Here are the questions I propose to those who continuously defend their use of the word "retarded" by saying that they "didn't mean it like that" or some other dismissive excuse: Would you be this comfortable using any other slur that historically degrades a group of minorities, or is it just disabled people? What about other medical terms? Would you say "I'm such a cancer patient" after a sneeze?
Let me assure you that my son is not stupid and comparing yourself to him when you make a mistake is hurtful and unnecessary. There are so many harmless words you could use without insulting an entire group of people who have to work so hard to do the things you take for granted.
My hope is that anyone who still uses this word in a derogatory manner will think twice before using it in the future. I hope that you will choose respect and acceptance instead of disregard. I hope that one day when you think of the words "mentally retarded", you think of strength, perseverance, and determination and you realize that maybe this is not the term to describe a negative experience, after all.
Let me assure you that my son is not stupid and comparing yourself to him when you make a mistake is hurtful and unnecessary. There are so many harmless words you could use without insulting an entire group of people who have to work so hard to do the things you take for granted.
My hope is that anyone who still uses this word in a derogatory manner will think twice before using it in the future. I hope that you will choose respect and acceptance instead of disregard. I hope that one day when you think of the words "mentally retarded", you think of strength, perseverance, and determination and you realize that maybe this is not the term to describe a negative experience, after all.
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